Monday, March 4, 2013

let it go...

When my kids were little, I remember feeling exhausted all the time.
Someone always whined at me.
Someone always clung to me.
Someone always needed my attention.

My dream was to wander down the grocery store isles, picking out cucumbers and toilet paper alone and in peace.

I tried to savor the moments. I think I did a pretty good job of it. But I couldn't help wishing, every once in a while, for them to be just a little bit older.
Old enough to not always whine at me.
Old enough to not always cling to me.
Old enough to not always need my attention.

My wish came true. So much faster than I meant it to come.
They still whine. They still cling. And they still need my attention.
But not always.

I looked at Ethan the other day, and noticed his almost-a-man hands. They are hard and bony and long.

And Ashley sat on the couch reading a book for 40 minutes. A big, heavy, 483 page book.

Josh pulled out his spelling and wrote his words over and over. Without being asked.

I don't know when they grew up.
But I do know the rest of their time here with me is going to fly by faster than I'd like it to.
And I know I need to enjoy every moment I have with them.

I need to not mind so much when they whine at me.
I need to savor every single time they still want to cling to me.
I need to give them my attention every time they need it.

Because they won't need it much longer.

And wandering through the grocery store picking out cucumbers and toilet paper alone and in peace?
Totally overrated.


  1. Gaylene, I have been thinking about this for a while now. And as much as I hate all the whining and fighting and crumbs all over the house I try to remember that it is going to pass too quickly. And I try not to complain about it. You made me tear up with your post. I just wish we could stop this time.

    1. I love watching my kids grow up, they are such amazing people. And life is definitely more peaceful now. But I know Josh isn't going to hold my hand much longer. Now I know why babies of the family are babied so much. I just don't want any of them to grow up quite as fast as they are. :)